Family's really... a guessing game, sometimes (because I really don't know how else I am supposed to describe it).
Pick my aunts, for example. And I am saying this because I am quite... annoyed? Mad? Enraged? Ah. I can't even take a propeer adjective.
What happened? Easy. It happened that my aunt Luise-daddy's youngest sister - has been a bitch (and I hope you'll forgive me my Franchesism). Few months ago, she and my dad's other sister, Laura, got into a fight (in which Luise's husband got involved as well); my father, because he lives far from them (over 200 km) and because they are both his sisters (and frankly, none of them was completely right, nor wrong) didn't take a side. Unfortunately, the fight escalated, and aunt Laura fought with Luise's husbands as well, said everything she thought about him (which isn't nice, nor has ever been. Despite her saying the contrary, I know that she has always, always spoken badly of him, and tried to get Luise to break up with him since 1996, when they started dating). My father didn't pick Laura's side; on the contrary, he remembered her that acting that way was just going to alienate their sister, and he didn't want that; he only got to see Luise once a year, best case scenario, and he didn't want to lose her.
So, he decided to be the pacekeaper-also because he is the eldest, so, yeah, kind of feeling like it was his role, all right?
So, he called. And called, and called... the phone always rang, and in the rare cases someone answered, it was always her husband. Either she wasn't there, or it was "sorry, I am losing you" and he hanged up and turned off the phone. And that, for months. We even met him at an exibition few months ago, and even if he acted with completely nonchalance and friendly (do you know, the stupid kind of way? All snaky smiles and pats on the back?), when asked about Luise, he answered that she was "Oh, somewhere, looking for a parking spot."
Really? Even if he had told her that she didn't need her driving license any longer now that she was married with him and her license had been expired for over a DECADE? Nice. I bet she was back home, but ehy, who knows. maybe she was driving around the city of Cuneo with her driving license expired, uncaring that, if discovered, the would have taken away her car and sold it...
But, anyway, were was I? Oh, yes, months and months of no contacts, no words. And, well, daddy is alittle paranoid. And my brother Drew too. So, when you hear every day at the news (and yes, we do) about woemn found in refrigerators, killed by partner (2 times last week), if you are a little paranoid, you get depressed. And worried. And when you call and call and no one answers...
so, daddy took his car, drove for 200 km (with the excuse that he was going to see someone for a work-related thing) and knocked at her door.
And yeah, she was there, in her house in the middle of the forest (for real, I am not exagerating), and when she saw her older brother after almost two years, after having gone for almost one without hearing his voice, you know what she did?
She talked with him accross the yard, not even bothering to open the gate. with her whole "Yes, I received your mail, I received your fax, I received your messagges. No, I don't want to come and celebrate your 60th birthday with the rest of the family. No, I don't want to get involved with the rest of the family. Oh, wait, you expected me to at least giving you a sign that I was alive and answer with even just a text? Silly me..."
Yesterday evening, my father cried. HE CRIED. this sixty years old man, big and strong, he cried. Because he ahd tried to take the side of each sister, and he ahd ended up being shout out from Luise's life.
Frankly, I don't care if she did it because her husband told her to, but... well, he wasn't there, so she could have at least talked. pretended to be nice, or... whatever you do with your brother. it's just...
If she is happy that way, all right, no problem. But you don't cut people out that way. You don't want tires any longer, want to cut them? You shout the door in their face. You tell them that you don't want to have nothing to do with them any longer. in their faces.
So, yeah. People are messy. And families... even more so.