May. 11th, 2016

little_firestar: (who and tardis)
My grandfather- mom's dad, who lived with us- passed away on the last day of October, quite suddenly. We didn't exact had the most awsome relationship, but he had had a good hand in rising me. Besides, I couldn't remember a time I hadn't seen him, or heard him, with the exception of my 20 days working at Expo Milan, where I barely called to say "Hi! I'm still alive!" once a day.
We lived together. I saw him everyday. I took care of each and every of his needs- from getting him to appointments, pay his bills, giivng him his medicines and so on.
When he died, I felt a void. Like suddenly I had all this time to fill and didn't know what to do with ti any longer. Suddenly I would get the table ready for six people, and then we would sit down and there would be only the five of us.
I was starting to feel a little better, thinking, "it happened, he is gone", when, please forgive me, please don't say I'm a silly, stupid person, I had to see the agony of my beloved Kitty, Miciolino, also known as Whithy; I was feeding him when he fell into a coma, and only murmured verses for over half a day- he then apssed away the enxt morning, at five AM, few minutes after I decided I was going to go to the emergency veterinary clinic and have him put to sleep, because it just wasn't right to make him suffer.
And now? Now, tomorrow, are moving my great-grandfather's remains- granfather's dad- into grandfather's tomb, and I have to be there with mum to sign papers, as we are the only descendents.
I foresee a new kind of pain...
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